How to Make Friends

How to Make Friends

Step 1: Leave your living room. Chances are, new friends are not going to spring up between your sofa and the television. To find buds, you have to step out.

Step 2: Be a joiner. If you’re a jock, sign up for a team; a reader, join a book club; a lush, take a wine-tasting class. Whatever your pleasure, put yourself in situations where you’ll meet people who share at least one common interest. It’ll give you something to gab about, and the rest will come more easily.

Step 3: Kindle womance. Take a chance, and ask one (or more) of your new acquaintances on a girlfriend date, say, for a beer after your stitch ’n’ bitch circle, or to the latest Catherine Opie exhibit between your photography classes. Your invitation will likely be well received, and your risk will bring rewards.

Step 4: Be a keeper. If you want to keep your circle growing, be a good friend: Listen, celebrate your pals’ successes, support them through their failures, and seek out fun together.

More Nifty Tips

• Diversify your friendships. It’s okay to have a work bud, a party pal, a gym mate, a hometown friend, and others. Everyone doesn’t have to be a soul mate, and placing unfair expectations on each will only lead to disappointment.

• Value quality over quantity. It’s not the number of contacts you have in your iPhone that counts. It’s the number of friends who will answer your call when you need them.

• Even if you have hundreds of friends on Facebook, that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t have in-the-flesh friends, too. There is no virtual substitute for a hug or a belly laugh.

• Be patient. It can take years to establish intimacy. Instead of worrying about what you don’t get from your friends, feel blessed for what they give you.